Pesky Critter

Thinking of getting a pygmy goat or some more chickens. I could get fresh milk from the goat. Having a goat around here might just be the missing ingredient. Vicki has instructed me to kill the squirrel that is stealing all the bird seed. I may have too. She keeps chasing it and pelting the poor little guy with rocks. Crushing its tiny little head may be my only option, I think we (the squirrel and I) would both be better off. Is it possible that the five hundred different birds we have out there could be eating some of the seeds? Well, before killing the little guy, I have raised the feeder to 10 feet, this way the squirrel cant get at it, and neither can my wife. It's a win, win deal. I don't have to crush a squirrel with a boulder, breaking my vow to love all sentient beings, although I would be killing out of love, so that may exempt me from some kind of bad karma deal. Where was I, oh, so I think this will solve the problem of Vicki. What? I started this babble, talking about my new goat. How do you milk a goat with out touching their scievey nipples. I like goat cheese. So tomorrow, I open the squirrel's back with a rake, just to prove my devotion to my wife.