End of the line

I'm at the end of my rope, and I'm glad. Maybe holding on to the stupid rope is what's is holding me back.

Two more days I'll never get back.

Spending two days with my six and a half year old twins HAS to cause brain damage. It would be much easier to spend the time at a punch myself in the face for two days festival. Or maybe a cut your own head off and play soccer with it till you drop contest. Or duct tape my hands to my sides, sprint down the middle of a busy street and giggle my way right into the front grill of a speeding bus(filled with children). I'm just glad Vicki is back. Oh, by the way, I got home from work on Friday and my McCain for President sign was torn off and tossed in the bushes. I almost burst into flames when I saw it. I just stood there, bug eyed, fists and teeth clenched, glaring at every car that drove by. I knew that they knew who did this. After fixing the sign, I spent the rest of the night watching the sign through my rifle scope.

How is this possible

Today I looked at the weather forcast for tommorow and it said "Clearing Sunday morning." Now it has a hurricane warning. If your job is predicting the weather, how do you go from clearing to hurricane in 8 hours? How can a hurricaine, that starts a thousand miles away traveling about 10 mph, sneak up on a New Hampshire weather man?

Good Mornin

Drinking coffee

Listening to Jazz

Kids doing homeschooling stuff (making thier own books)

Raining

Vicki and Taylor at Lowel Open Sudio's selling art

Wow, it took me a long time to put that live link in there

Not only is the universe stranger than we imagine, it is stranger than we can imagine.
- Sir Arthur Eddington

Happy Native American Day

Best wishes to all my Native American brothers and sisters. I only claim I'm a Native American if there aren't any real ones around to kick my ass. My Great Great Grandmother was a Miq Mac, born in Nova Scotia in 1864, so there is some truth to my claim. Anyway, Native American or not, all the Earth's creatures are brother and sister. More than that, we are one.

Italian Goodness

I almost got run over today. I was so excited about getting some pastry that I just flung open the door to my work van and sprinted across the street, ignoring all the oncoming cars. I pissed off a few people, but at the time nothing else mattered. At that moment, they could all not die fast enough for me. I just wanted some delicious Italian pastries. I got some nice goodies, I was even thoughtful enough to get some to bring home to my loving family. Of course when I got back in the van I ate the entire bag. I was eating so fast that I started to choke because I was inhaling the powdered sugar off of the desserts as I put them into my mouth. My crazy cousin wouldn't try any, he said he didn't eat sweets. It made me want to smash his face in.

Snapping Turtle Photo

Sunday Morning

I'm thinking of taking the girls apple picking today. To bring my own brand of justice to those......

Why do I constantly feel the need to bring my own brand of justice everywhere I go, and what does that even mean. And why do fellow apple pickers need justice, all they need are a few apples for a delicious pie (or maybe an apple fight).

Art Festival Part 2

I just got back, I had to bring the kids home and get the pickup truck and now I have to go back and load everything up. Not only did I not dole out any pain, but I think I joined some "Stop Global Warming" cult. Some young "dish" was walking around with a clipboard and made me sign some petition and give my name. I also volunteered to do, I don't know what. What a joke. Here I am agreeing with her, signing my life away, while in my brain I'M screaming, "There's no such thing as global warming, you whore".

Art Festival Update

OK, I just got back from the Concord Art Festival, to pick up my kids. I am so enraged, there are Obama supporters everywhere. Of course I pretended to be one of them, just to lull them into a false sense of security. I'm heading back now, and I'm bringing a big box of pain with me, which I will dole out when I get there.

Saturday plan

My wife has a big "Art in The Park" type deal going on in Concord this weekend. She will be selling art. I will be there, stomping hippies.

Pinnocio and Luigi

While playing around in my workshop my twins re-discovered the puppets I'd made
.

My Luigi is a big boy, he weighs about 20 pounds.

I really should finish his hands.

I had a turkey sandwich.

So what, a turkey is barely a life form. My appetite for flesh has been overwhelming. It must be all the killing I'm doing to feed my little baby turtle. I've given up digging for worms because I found some in the cooler at the local market(who knew). Anyway, for dinner I wanted to go to "Wendy's" for a triple cheeseburger but Vicki talked me into getting a sandwich at "Panera". I had the turkey sandwich, but I did tell them to hold the bacon. I don't eat pigs because it's a sin, and whoever eats them will surely rot in hell, where they belong.

Snapping Turtle Update

I spent most of today foraging for various grubs for my baby boy. My primordial hunting and motherly instincts are slowly coming back to me. I've been digging for earthworms all day, the yard is destroyed. So far I've found two. I tore apart a pile of old patio blocks, like a grizzly bear tearing apart a hillside looking for a woodchuck. At one point I saw a cricket and got so excited that I mashed it into dust with one of the blocks. My girls kept asking me "what are you doing Daddy", which pissed me off even more than I already was. Leonardo, noticing I was preoccupied, booked it out of the back yard and was heading for freedom. Luckily I caught sight of him just as he making his way through the fence. As I ran after him I said to myself, "No one escapes from the Island of Doctor Moreau".

I took a life today....

... to feed my newborn son. Little M.C. was in need of some nourishment so I went in the yard and kilt him up a grasshopper. It was more of a holy experience. A holy experiecne where something gets crushed against the fence. I might add that it didn't totally displease me.

Darkness

I'm all alone. It's just me and this brain crushing silence. The kids are away, my wife is upstairs trying to pretend she lives alone. The clouds in my brain are clearing and I notice that it's raining outside. How long I've been sitting here, I can't say. I hear the sound of someone or something walking around, outside my window. I care not. I swear the ice cream in the freezer is trying to communicate with me. No food after dark. It gives me nightmares.

?

Glass of wine and a "circus freakshow" sized cupcake for dessert.

I count the maple in maplewalnut frosting as a vegetable. It comes from a tree that comes from the ground,dummy.

I weighed Leo the tortoise today, 17 pounds.

I may write myself in for president.

I think I may vomit.

"They" are watching some slasher horror movie.(makes me sick)

I'm drawing a bath.

Full moons give me the "night crazies"

Willie Nelson is above the law.

Might eat the last cupcake.

Veggie Update

My wife brought me home fried chicken, I asked her to but was pissed off when she did. I haven't had meat in a while. I'm pretty sure I will be classifying chicken as a vegetable real soon, but for now I remain strong, with beans and rice cooking on the stove. Swine will never be a vegetable to me.

MC and Leo

I can't believe the maternal instincts of my male African Sucata tortoise. He has already become a serogate mother to little "M.C."

Snapping Turtle Hatchling

Another of the wild creatures has sought refuge in my light of shining goodness. Little "MC", sensing my love of all the living, came walking up to me while I was standing in my driveway(pondering my goodness). I was busy, checking my reflection in the window, when I felt a scratching on my foot. Before even looking down, the huge smile on my face told me that a little tiny baby turtle was asking me for help. What amazes me is how they know that I'm the one.

Newest Family Member-"M.C. Cain"

Another Raven Drawing

I thought about eating a mosquito today.

It's Not Easy Being Me

Well, I've got my orange herbal tea going and my banjo around my neck. I'm practicing the kindergarten version of "Will The Circle Be Unbroken", I almost have it down. I spent most of the afternoon mowing the stupid lawn. Still haven't had any meat, except fish, in over a week. We went out to the "Common Man" in Concord last night and I had a nice broiled haddock. The highlight of dinner was when the bill came, Vicki opens her wallet and hands me some money and says "Here you can pay for dinner". So that made me feel good about myself. Then on the way out she handed me a buck, to tip the valet guy. Its fine because, in my mind, I stabbed her in the eye with my imaginary cigarette.

I'm Happy

I get to go out and be around big people tonight, I'll keep you posted. It takes me awile to adjust to being near adults. Its kind of like I'm Cornelius from the Planet of the Apes and I just arrived from some time machine. Lots of staring, laughing and eating bugs out of Vicki's hair. Maybe we'll go see the "Water Guy". Anyway, I have go and wash off my stink, she'll be home soon.

Midday

Four cups of coffee so far, I feel invincible. Meat is what pansies eat. I go out in the woods and graze, just like the forest creatures. Just drop down on the ground an start gnawing. Just think, eating stuff that grows in the ground, it's like you're eating the planet. The twins and I are going to venture out into society in a bit. We go into stores and pretend we're invisible, then we knock stuff off of the shelves in front of people. We then start laughing uncontrollably, because they can't see us. It works great at the book store. Vicki gave me a bunch of errands to run, like I'm some bitched up flunky born to serve her.

Still No Meat

I've been doing some deep thinking. My whole sentient beings shouldn't be gnawed on theory might have a flaw in it. If the animal is already dead, is it still a sentient being? Does it still have any rights? Should I just let the meat rot? What a waste of life. I get that , as a beacon of light, I shouldn't go around stomping on earthworms. But if I happen upon an already dead worm, who am I harming by reaching down and plopping the little fella in my mouth? As for eating chicken, not only is the chicken dead already, but most likely it's already cooked. It would be an insult to this beautiful little bird, kind of like saying "you're not good enough to eat". This is going to need more thought. I still don't buy the argument that God put these animals on Earth for our own pleasure. What about the animals that dine on us, the sharks, the crocodiles, the elephants, are we put here to be their dinner? Oh, that reminds me, when I die, I want my ashes sprinkled on a rotting buffalo carcass, deep in the Yellowstone back country. This way a hungry Griz eats me, and my spirit melds with the great bear.

Still at it

I have no idea how many days it's been since I ate meat, all I know is there's no meat in ice cream, and that's all that matters at the moment. I've been thinking about the whole fish doesn't count as meat thing. I guess a fish has a right to live as much as anything else. A tuna certainly has as much right to live as a dolphin. I wonder if I can find tuna that isn't dolphin safe, because that's hypocritical bullshit. "Dolphin Safe",that's like something Hitler would do. What gives dolphins the right to live over tuna, the same rules should apply to them both. It could be that dolphins taste like crap, I don't know. I was also thinking about just not eating pigs, Vicki talked me out of that. Too soon to give up. Today I was thinking that I could get away with eating turkey sausages, but turkeys are animals as well. I was also trying to convince myself that if I kill and eat my own chickens that it wouldn't count, because I love them so much and making such a sacrifice would cancel out the negative karma of eating a family pet. I think that's right out of the bible. God asked one of his disciples to kill and eat his all his pets, to prove his loyalty.

Slipping Away

I'm just sitting here, waiting for Vicki to get home, clicking an empty pistol pressed against my head. Been with the twins all day. Hiking and pine cone/stick collecting in the morning, gluing the pine cones and sticks into silly puppets in the afternoon, driving my nuts the rest of the day. I missed the entire Jerry Lewis Telethon because of them. I had some falafel for dinner, no meat since Thursday. I'm tired.